I love who you are. I just need you to understand where my animal brain was.I think that this resentment coupled with my own guilt about what I'd been up to in New Orleans was why I provoked you when I was in LA, and why I was so short with you. None of that you deserved or expected – that was my own fucked up wiring being put on you. I'm sorry my love. I can't say that often enough.So there's the low level resentment, and then there's the other part that I've been advised is part of my personality make up. I don't honestly buy this on a conscious level, but I'm told it's there and explains part of what I did.Apparently I have some deep-rooted submission streak. Not a huge one – not anything that makes me need to wear any of those stupid clothes or run around and call any one master or get slapped around or anything like that. Just a need, at times, to have a man tell me what to do. To be, in the words of Doctor Bellingham, 'Firmly Guided'. It's not all the time, and not all the time. My hands grasped her head, my fingers entwining her hair as I decided to enjoy her mouth. Slowly at first, I started to pump my cock into her mouth; I did not want to ruin things, but something inside me told me that this was what we both needed. On my seventh or eighth thrust, I felt my cock hit the back of her throat and I looked down to check if Heather was OK. My eyes were met by hers, big, beautiful and full of sexual desire. Then she looked down, at the same time forcing her head down again until my cock went to the back of her throat. That look will live me for a long time. It was then that I decided to go for broke and thrust harder. This time my cock entered the top of her throat. Heather spluttered around my flesh but did not look up or try to pull away. I thrust again, pressing further; I felt her gag slightly and then try to swallow. I pulled back and then thrust again, this time a little more of me penetrated. I moved my right hand to hold her under her chin at the top of.
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